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The Art of Romance

October 31, 2011

According to Tiffany & Co, which is undoubtedly an expert on romance.

The full list can be read here.

Know Someone’s Favorites.

Favorite flowers. Favorite authors.

Favorite designers. How she takes her coffee.

Shaken, not stirred. Get the drift?

Everyone Has Secrets.

Some are sad. Some are hilarious.

Some are scandalous. Most are just mundane.

When you love someone who loves you,

secrets are not a problem.

My Friends, Your Friends.

Respect for each other means respect for each other’s friends.

If this is a problem, it’s a real problem. Attend to it.

Music Is Magic.

Especially romantic music.

Especially live music.

Especially an original song

written just for someone.

Timing Is Everything.

When moods turn south, blossoms do wonders.

When nights get cold, firesides are cozy.

When work grinds down, champagne bubbles up.

Light The Candles.

Use the good china. And crystal.

When you are together, put style in your life.

This is part of living well, together.

This is romance.

Open New Doors Together.

Don’t sit back. Step out.

The adventures you share build bonds that last forever.

New adventures entail some risk,

and risk can be quite intoxicating.

Talk About Money.

About saving. Debt. Past behavior.

Expectations, confrontations and tribulations.

Put it all on the table now

so it won’t be a nuisance later.

Families Are Different.

Suddenly families start to matter

the closer you get to an engagement and wedding.

Fortunately, families don’t get married.

Only two people in love can marry.

In dealing with another’s family

a little accommodation, humor and affection

goes a long way.

Tastes Are Supposed To Differ.

That’s part of the electricity.

That’s part of an exciting life.

You say tomato, I say to-mah-to.

Pay Attention To Clothes.

Not your clothes, silly.

Someone in love dresses very carefully.

And it’s a very good idea to take notice.

The choices made were made to please you.

To Show You Are Serious.

When you are introducing

the single most important person in your life,

acknowledge the whole person

by using first and last names.

Your closest friends are not meeting just another Susan.

They are meeting Susan Wagner,

the love of your life.

Surprises Are Essential.

An unscheduled night of dancing.

Suddenly, tickets to Paris. A hidden gift.

Surprises lift romance to stratospheric heights.

Don’t Answer The Phone.

During dinner. Nobody has permission to interrupt conversations

and destroy the ambience of this end-of-day ritual.

Out Of Sight, But Not Out Of Mind.

When alone and out of town on business,

how wonderful is it to find flowers

waiting for you in your hotel room?

Unforgettable, actually.

Bring Back The Love Letter.

Make no mistake about it:

there is nothing quite so tender and romantic

as receiving a love letter.

Yes, handwritten on nice stationery

and delivered just to you.

See The Forest For The Trees.

Try not to dwell on miniscule details and

silly differences of opinion.

He can like Deco and you can like Nouveau

and still be madly in love.

In the grand picture it matters not.

The Victorians Did It.

They read aloud to each other.

Often for a lifetime.

Novels, stories, articles.

This is a wonderful way to share something you enjoy.

And by the way, it can be very romantic.

Compromise Is An Art.

Managed gracefully without resentment,

it is the magic behind true love.

Walk Together.

For centuries walking was at the center of courtship.

It still is, but without vigilant chaperones close behind.

On a walk silence is permitted.

On a walk difficult subjects can be broached.

On a walk, hand-in-hand, two hearts can be one.

Cook Together.

And clean up together.

Every Now And Then.

Dress to the nines. Send a note of mad love.

Do a headstand. Go off the grid.

Why not?

Keep Listening.

We all have a tendency to listen more carefully

to people we’ve just met. This is unfortunate.

Keep listening and you’ll avoid countless misunderstandings.

In the process, you will learn something.

And, deepen your love.

The Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living.

That’s what Socrates thought a few thousand years ago.

And he makes a big point today for couples in love.

Only when you know yourself can you truly love another.

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